AlzCaregiving36-7
36-Hour Day
Credit to whomever it was who wrote a book titled, something like the "Thirty-six hour day" referring to caregiving for Alzheimer's patients.
Although I have been thinking about this for some time, I decided to start this without much research or evaluation... Very uncharacteristic for me.
I am a consultant who runs a home-based business. My real job is caring for my 88-year-old mother, who was diagnosed with dementia, probable Alzheimer's in October 2000. Most months I manage to pay the bills and that is my goal -- nothing more for what I'm guessing will be at least another 5 to 7 years, assuming my mother's life span follows the pattern of her family and that of dementia/Alzheimer's.
Why am I beginning this blog now? Perhaps, it's reading about Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Connor stepping down from the court to care for her husband who apparently has dementia. Perhaps, it's the approaching first anniversary of my father's death, 8/11/04, when I became the primary caregiver for my mother. Perhaps, it's the recent death of my mother's younger brother, who was also close to my father. Perhaps, it's all or none, I'm not sure.
In any case, I expect to post things I am learning as I learn them. There are so many reports of the sadness and devastation of this disease or diseases and I don't intend to claim otherwise on that issue. Simple day-to-day functioning is impaired in so many ways. But there are things I am still learning from my mother...
For example, in 2000, as she was diagnosed, I asked her: "Are you afraid? Are you angry?" She was 83 and I was devastated. I had not yet reached an operational peace with it.
"No," she said. "I remember mother (yes, my grandmother) ... taking care of her and it was the most important thing I ever did. It could be worse. It could be cancer with all of that pain. So, it's really not so bad after all."
Now, with that...don't get me wrong. There are days when I am a raging maniac at this dear sweet woman who has turned my life upside down. I expect to share some of those rages and what I am trying to learn about myself in the process.
Another reason I'm writing ... the worst is yet to come, folks, as the baby boomers age and as incidence of dementia increases -- the worst is yet to come. Will the "me" generation be able to cope with this? Chances are they will. Their first move will be to try to buy their way out and that may work for many. But, those like me, for whom writing a check for caregiving is not a financial option, will have to find different models. I guess that's what writing about the experience is an attempt to convey also.
Credit to whomever it was who wrote a book titled, something like the "Thirty-six hour day" referring to caregiving for Alzheimer's patients.
Although I have been thinking about this for some time, I decided to start this without much research or evaluation... Very uncharacteristic for me.
I am a consultant who runs a home-based business. My real job is caring for my 88-year-old mother, who was diagnosed with dementia, probable Alzheimer's in October 2000. Most months I manage to pay the bills and that is my goal -- nothing more for what I'm guessing will be at least another 5 to 7 years, assuming my mother's life span follows the pattern of her family and that of dementia/Alzheimer's.
Why am I beginning this blog now? Perhaps, it's reading about Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Connor stepping down from the court to care for her husband who apparently has dementia. Perhaps, it's the approaching first anniversary of my father's death, 8/11/04, when I became the primary caregiver for my mother. Perhaps, it's the recent death of my mother's younger brother, who was also close to my father. Perhaps, it's all or none, I'm not sure.
In any case, I expect to post things I am learning as I learn them. There are so many reports of the sadness and devastation of this disease or diseases and I don't intend to claim otherwise on that issue. Simple day-to-day functioning is impaired in so many ways. But there are things I am still learning from my mother...
For example, in 2000, as she was diagnosed, I asked her: "Are you afraid? Are you angry?" She was 83 and I was devastated. I had not yet reached an operational peace with it.
"No," she said. "I remember mother (yes, my grandmother) ... taking care of her and it was the most important thing I ever did. It could be worse. It could be cancer with all of that pain. So, it's really not so bad after all."
Now, with that...don't get me wrong. There are days when I am a raging maniac at this dear sweet woman who has turned my life upside down. I expect to share some of those rages and what I am trying to learn about myself in the process.
Another reason I'm writing ... the worst is yet to come, folks, as the baby boomers age and as incidence of dementia increases -- the worst is yet to come. Will the "me" generation be able to cope with this? Chances are they will. Their first move will be to try to buy their way out and that may work for many. But, those like me, for whom writing a check for caregiving is not a financial option, will have to find different models. I guess that's what writing about the experience is an attempt to convey also.
posted by BK Kincaid at 9:53 AM
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